Senior Care Wish List – Giving Seniors a Voice When They Need It The Most

When seniors become seriously ill and are unable to make health care decisions for themselves, those responsible for their care--whether it be a spouse, a child or another relative--may not have the slightest idea of what type of care is most appropriate. There are, of course, documents such as a living will that can effectively answer these and many other relevant questions related to your elder’s care. Living wills, however, are often mired in legalese and can contain a tremendous amount of detail that takes time and knowledge to decipher.

A senior care wish list, on the other hand, is a document that clearly and simply states what a person’s preferences are when that time comes. In addition, it encourages conversation between family members and physicians. An example of this type of document is the Five Wishes document.

Five Wishes informs your family and physician about:

1. Who will make health care decisions for you when you are unable to make them for yourself.
2. The kind of medical treatment you want or don't want.
3. How comfortable you want to be.
4. How you want people to treat you.
5. What you want your loved ones to know.

Many hospices and hospitals encourage their patients to fill out a document like the Five Wishes form. Bette Goglia, chaplain at Mary Washington Home Health and Hospice in Virginia, gives incoming patients a Five Wishes form as part of their admissions packet. In her article, “The Five Wishes Form is an Effective Way to Deal with End-of-Life Issues,” Stephanie Tait of the Fredericksburg Free-Lance Star notes, "We spend so much time planning for a wedding and for the birth of a child, but when it comes to life and death, we would much rather deal with life."

How It All Started

As the story goes, Jim Towey, a man who worked closely with Mother Teresa, was inspired by this experience and began looking for a way for families to plan ahead and cope with serious illness. Subsequently, he created the Five Wishes document which has become so widely-used that popular media has penned it the first "living will with a heart."

Because of increased public awareness of living wills--particularly in view of recent legal battles surrounding the wishes of seriously ill individuals--this type of document becomes very important for both seniors and their family members.

This document should be designed to suit each individual’s needs but the five points mentioned above cover the essential information that needs to be communicated to family members and medical professionals. The important thing to remember is that this is a pre-planning document and should be something that is created well in advance of the onset of any serious medical condition.

Most importantly, this document was designed to encourage seniors to think about their health, personal, emotional and spiritual beliefs and desires, and to discuss them with loved ones and physicians. It will also help your senior to face and consider situations which commonly arise as the end of life approaches. Although these issues may be unpleasant to think about when a person is still in good health, in actuality, that is when your senior will have the clearest idea of what those needs will be.

Note: The Five Wishes document is recognized as a legal advance directive document in all but 13 states (Supportive Care Coalition, Five Wishes)